How to take and give constructive criticism? Part 2

Giving constructive criticism is showing when it is intended in getting rid of the character of someone rather than personal attacks on someone. It can be productive when you present an alternative outcome. Instead of saying you are wrong say this is wrong it’s also about saying yes, that one way of looking at it but have you considered this other option.

How do you determine whether the criticism you give is constructive? It is how it is presented. It not constructive if presented in anger, a looking down tone, unfriendly manner, or even publicly. It must be presented in a way that the criticism is trying to further a discussion rather than an attack. Personal attacks should be avoided as they lead to the other person trying to defend themselves rather than listening to the critical comment.

Every leader should be an expert in dealing with criticism. Whether public or personal attacks it is always important to listen to yourself and even ask yourself why am I reacting so strongly to this criticism? Why am I hurt by this? This will help you gauge it’s validity and reliability and whether you should take it seriously after all it could be from mere jealousies, enemies and people who criticize based on their personal weaknesses and feelings of being threatened. The more serious you feel on a criticism the more it’s an attack on your integrity and if this happens take time to find out why it makes you feel this way. Because this is how you can learn about yourself and for yourself. In other cases if after criticism and you think everyone else is wrong and you are always right. That’s a red flag. It may be a sign that you’ve been in power for too long to listen to others.

Dealing with criticism wisely and being able to ignore the anonymous comments on social media and to listen to your intuition is a skill that a leader and one aspiring to be a leader should possess. It is in social media where people give critique without taking any responsibility for it this means they can throw comments right, left, and center without knowing any basic information about the situation. One thing you should always know is that you are never as good as they say you are when you are at the top and you are never as bad as critics say when they are trying to throw you off.

Lastly Karin Forseke once said “keep your moorings, stay true to your values, and follow your instincts. This always help when you analyze whether the criticism you receive is worthy taking. It’s important to listen to it, though, and to your own reaction to it, go through it, it is worthy it as it will make you stronger. Always choose to deal with criticism wisely.